Booty Nomad

Sometimes you have to go through numbers 2-200 to get to the One.

'One day I woke up and looked over at her and noticed something. I was unhappy. I loved her, I ache for her to this day, but I wasn't happy. So I did the hardest and most courageous thing I have ever done. I broke up with her by email. Okay, in many ways, I'm small. But I'm trying to get bigger.'

David has just dumped the girl he loved. But it wasn't his fault. Not really. She made him do it. After all, she was The Eater of Souls. And now she's buried in the relationship graveyard that is David's mobile phone directory - alongside Opera Girl, Bendy Girl, Ru Paul and Totem Pole. The only problem is, The Eater of Souls is still eating him up. He misses everything about her. Even her stubborn refusal to have sex with him because she felt like her dog was watching. We've all been there.

Then along comes The Goddess. She's perfect: funny, attractive and, most importantly, single. In short, she's every booty nomad's fantasy: she might just be The One. But The Goddess is, er, a Goddess - not so easy to catch and even harder to keep. And nobody is capable of screwing up the really important things in life quite like our romantically impaired hero.

From the pathetic paranoias of the love-lorn to the cringe-worthy cock-ups of the love struck, 'Booty Nomad' is a wickedly funny and unexpectedly touching novel. Shot through with dialogue to die for and lovably mixed-up characters, it presents a view of modern life that will seem painfully familiar to all booty nomads out there . . .